What if I told you that you could be better at sex without actually getting better at the act of sex at all? You might say I’m crazy, but I’m not. Well maybe a little bit, but the fact is, you can get better at sex without ever having to have sex, change your methods of penetration or learn a single thing about the female anatomy.
Here’s exactly how to be better at sex, that has nothing to do with the sex itself.
1) Be better at sex by simply talking
Believe it or not, without even touching her, your words can make you a much better lover.
a) For starters, tell her how beautiful she looks, especially when the clothes come off. Due to the high standards set by the media, so many women are self-conscious about their bodies. Simply taking a second to stand back, admire her naked body, and just say, “wow, you are incredible,” is enough to take away any of her insecurities and allow her to relax and enjoy the experience. When she’s relaxed she’s more likely to climax, and that makes you the man.
b) Second, when you are in the act, ask her what she likes. Hardly anyone does this, but it is so powerful. Instead of guessing and doing what you like, you can satisfy her needs and fulfill some of her secret desires.
Tip: Don’t ask her, “umm, what should I do?” Be smart, and sexy about it. Work it into the flow of the passion and simply say “tell me what you like most,” or something smooth and commanding. It will make her feel like she’s in good hands.
c) Last, talking dirty during sex can make the experience that much more exciting. This is the toughest one for people to pick up because to some it just does not come naturally. If this isn’t natural to you then take it slow and try it out, or just stick to the first two points. Dirty talk is like anything else, you may feel uncomfortable the first few times but with practice, it will start to come naturally.
2) Extend foreplay
Foreplay is not sex, but being better at foreplay will instantly make you a better lover. For anyone who doesn’t know, foreplay is the action leading up to sex (or the kissing and massaging). This may be boring to guys who just want to hop on here and get at it, but women love foreplay. And if you master it, you are way ahead of the game.
My favorite thing to do is give the girl a full-body sensual massage. Get her comfortable of the bed and rub down her whole body with some warm oil. By making her feel like she’s getting pampered and treated, you are warming her up, exploring her beautiful body, and easing any tension that either of you might have.
After about 10 minutes of massage, gently start to finger her as she lays on her stomach. Then flip her over and stimulate her nipples with your mouth while you continue to finger her while now massaging her clitoris. She’s going to feel amazing at this point and this makes bringing her to climax much easier. From here you can either move on to oral sex or jump straight into regular sex. The leftover oil all over her body is going to make everything much better for both of you.
3) Touch her everywhere
Touch is so powerful. Especially when it comes to foreplay. Don’t just jump in, kiss her a few times, and then slide it in. Touch her everywhere. Girls have erogenous zones all over their body and by exploring every inch of her, you’ll open her up to the pleasure she didn’t know she could have.
To master these erogenous zones check out this great article written last week on the erogenous zones of women.
By turning her on so much through touch, you’re making it easier for her to climax during the actual sex itself. Having the same exact sex but adding touch beforehand may make all the difference on whether she finishes or is left high and dry.
For more tips check out: The Ultimate Guide To Erotic Erogenous Zones
4) Set the mood
You can be better at sex just by setting a different mood.
Have you ever had awkward, quiet, uncomfortable sex. Not great. So how can you be better at sex by changing the mood you do it in?
a) Control the lighting
Unless you’re getting down in the daytime, sex in bright fluorescent light won’t make her feel sexy. Get some lights that dim, or maybe take things down to the fireplace. This romantic atmosphere will make her experience much more memorable and make you seem like a better lover.
b) Put on some music
I can’t tell you what a piece of difference music will make in your sexual experience. If you have been having sex all these years without music then you really are missing out.
Music will make both of you relax, especially if it’s something with a nice beat that you can just lose yourself in. My favorite type of music to play is triphop or chillstep, which is just trippy beats with some good base. Its borderline techno and dubstep but not so hardcore. It honestly makes me feel like I’m an animal in the jungle. The inhibitions fall and things just get wild.
Tip: Don’t just play tunes off your phone. This isn’t sexy. You don’t need some thousand dollar sounds system to show some class. I have the Bose Soundlink Mini and it awesome. It fits in the palm of your hand, plays everything wireless through Bluetooth via any phone, iPad, or computer, and sounds unbelievable. With the right lighting & some awesome music, the passion reaches a level it never could in the silence.
Bringing it all together
As you can see, just upping your game in areas around sex is the fastest and easiest way to be better at sex. You don’t have to learn hundreds of sexual positions or take a class on female pleasure. Just tweak these tiny details and watch her crave you more than ever.
The bedroom is truly where the magic happens, this will help you make sure that magic isn’t a disappearing act.
Hey guys, I’m Sean a self improvement enthusiast with over 10 years experience in the health and wellness industry. My mission is to help you become the best version of yourself.
Certifications: Certified Life Coach, Dating Coach, Nutritionist