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How to Give a Sensual Massage

how to give a sensual massage

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If you are looking to learn how to give a sensual massage then you are in the right place. I am a professional massage therapist with over 20 years of experience & my mission is simple: to make your wife or GF the happiest woman ever.

Seansual massage is one of the greatest gifts you can give your partner.

There’s nothing quite as intimate as giving someone all of your attention and energy to selflessly give them a relaxing and pleasurable experience.

This guide is meant to give you the foundational knowledge you need to be able to give your girl (or boy) an amazing sensual massage as fast as tonight.

And if you stick around until the end of this article, I’ll share how to turn this sensual massage into a mutually agreed sexual experience without a single word. Then, if it does go down this road, I’ll even show you where you can learn to give a yoni/pussy massage, including the very unusual massage technique that can bring any girl to a full-body orgasm.

Either way, you’re going to be able to massage her like a God, and she’s not going to know what hit her.

Enjoy. 😊

key takeaways

  • A warm environment and comfort are key to a successful sensual massage. 🌡️💆‍♀️
  • Sensual massages are an incredibly hot and effective way to kick-start sex. 🔥
  • Sensual massages are all about gentle, relaxing moves, not power plays. 💪🚫
  • Communication, boldness, and making her feel special trump fancy techniques. 💘

what is sensual massage?

A sensual massage, often known as an erotic massage, involves using specific techniques on a person’s erogenous zones to heighten their sexual pleasure. This could include getting the recipient sexually aroused or even helping them reach the big ‘O’.

As a skilled massage therapist, I can tell you it’s not just about kneading muscles, but also about creating a connection with your partner using essential massage oils and techniques.

Picture it as a sensual dance of touch, heightened pleasure, and very deep intimacy.

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How to Give Sensual Massage She’ll Never Forget

giving a sensual massage

What do you think when you think of sensual massage?

Slow music, gentle hands, comfort, and relaxation? Sounds good and feels good, but…imagine if you are the one doing the massage, touching the silky skin and erotic curves of a woman’s body.

Sexy, isn’t it?

We could go really deep into this and read about 80 massage therapy styles1 along with a wide variety of pressures, movements, health benefits, and sensual massage techniques. But we are not going to. You are not a massage therapist, and what really matters here is perfecting a gesture that can be used as powerful foreplay.

I’m going to show you how to give a sensual massage that will connect you to her body and let you explore it. Even if you only give her a 10-minute rubdown, you will be rewarded with a relaxed and happy woman in your arms (or in your bed).

The Sensual Massage: Step by Step

Erotic massage

So let’s break down how to give your wife the best sensual massage of her life.

We’re going to go step by step here, and for more advanced body massage techniques see the bottom of the article which will have a video breaking down every massage style.

And for the guys who want to go even further, and absolutely blow their wife’s mind we’ve got our Erotic Massage Mastery Video Course taught by expert Jakob Wulfe and his partner Laura. It will teach you how to give the ultimate erotic massage ending in a yoni or vaginal massage that will leave your wife speechless.

Well, she’ll be unable to speak as she lays there in ecstasy.

But she’ll thank you later, don’t worry.

Now let’s get into how to give your wife the best (erotic) massage she’s ever had.

Step 1: Set The Mood

Romantic bedroom with candles

Setting the mood is one of the most important steps in a erotic massage. The massage is meant to be sensual! You need her to feel as comfortable as possible.

First, dim the lights and light a few candles. This provides a nice romantic ambiance. Next, prepare your place for a massage. Find a good firm surface for her to lie down on (your bed, a beach towel, on the floor, or even on a table (this is assuming you don’t have a professional massage table).

If you are giving her a simple hand or scalp massage, a chair will do just fine.

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Step 2: Put on Some Music


Music is a vital part of setting the right mood for sensual massages. Please, no AC/DC, Metallica, or Marilyn Manson. Ambient sounds or something like “Liquid Mind” will do just fine. 👇🏼

Make sure you know what your goal is; either to make her relaxed & ready for sex or to put her to sleep.

If a romantic body massage is an appetizer before the main course, then choose something sexy like soul music (just YouTube erotic massage playlist), or if it’s for relaxation then go for soft and slow blues, or even nature sounds such as running water or the sounds of the rainforest.
Professional masseuse | Menprovement

Step 3: Have massage oil on Hand

sensual massage oil

Massage oil is your main ingredient. It’s as important as a mechanic’s wrench. The list of appropriate oils you can use is long.

  • Hemp
  • Jojoba
  • Hazelnut
  • Apricot
  • Kernel
  • Argan
  • Avocado
  • Safflower
  • Rosehip Seed
  • Walnut
  • Camelia
  • Macadamia Nut
  • Marula
  • Almond
  • Moringa
  • Grapeseed
  • Sunflower
  • Sesame
  • Mustard
  • Borage oil
  • Mixed Oil
  • Coconut

You can find all these and more at the health food store. Also, spa shops and skincare stores have a big variety of blended massage oils containing two or more relaxing essential oils. These can be very appealing.

Almond oil is one of the most popular and my personal favorite as a woman. It is slightly oily but allows your hands to slide smoothly. Plus, it doesn’t get absorbed too easily so you won’t need to keep reapplying.

Best massage oil
Pure body almond massage oil
Pure Body
  • 100% pure, cold-pressed Sweet Almond Oil
  • Extremely relaxing
  • Makes your skin feel softer

Make sure to buy organic oil in small quantities and store them in a cool area.

Step 4: Start With a Head Massage (No massage oil Needed)

head massage

A head massage can be extremely relaxing. Plus they are perfect for a girl who you have not yet been intimate with, and who may be a little hesitant to letting you touch her sensitive areas.

Have her lie down on her stomach with her head on a pillow. If she is uncomfortable without a massage table she can turn her head to one side and change its position from time to time. Also, if it’s easier for you, you can give a head massage if she is in any comfortable seated position.

Start by rubbing her temples and forehead. Then, run fingers through her hair and apply gentle downward pressure. Massage the entire scalp in this manner for as long as you wish, and then kiss her ears (sensitive erogenous zone) at the end.

Check below for a perfect tutorial video.👇🏼

Credits: Massage ASMR

Step 5: Move to a Back, Shoulder, and Neck Massage

Romantic back massage

Back, shoulder, and neck massage is what you think of right away when you hear the word massage. And for good reason. This is one of the most relaxing sensual massages to receive and can quickly turn into a sensual evening.

For this, the woman has to be face down and her back must be bare. Get a moderate amount of massage oil, warm it in your hands, and apply it to her upper body. Start with long strokes on her back, up and down. Then start to do some Shiatsu and kneading to the shoulders, while every once in a while progressing to gently stroke the neck.

Christina’s Tip:

The bonus of this sensual rubdown is that eventually, you will make your way down to the buttocks, which we will cover in number 3.

Step 6: Massage That Booty 🍑

Buttock massage

The buttocks are a highly erotic area meant to be spoiled with your new moves. This is a very erotic massage that is perfect for romantic foreplay. Just make sure she is game before you start.

Place your palms on her erotic mounds and massage her in circular movements. Increase the pressure gradually as you cover every area. Next, place your hands on her right buttock and use the kneading technique.

Remember, create a roll of skin using your thumbs and push it up. Repeat on the left side. She may just enjoy this as much as you.
Professional Masseuse | Menprovement
Credits: Rebel Massage

Step 7: Progress to Leg Massage

man giving leg massage to pregnant wife

She will be pleased if you stroke her thighs and calves, knead them lightly and caress them using your fingertips.

Make sure not to put too much pressure on the knee pits while you use your thumbs to gently massage the area around the kneecap.

For a leg massage, it is best to have her lie on her back.

See the video below 👇🏼

Credits: Rehab Science

Step 8: Take Care of The Feet

The feet are a very special part of the body. They are literally a sensual map of all the body, reflecting different organs and even personalities.

pussy massage

Have her lie down on her back. Do not press too much in any small areas because you can make her have diarrhea for a week (trust me, its possible).

Pro Tip:

Start from the heel and go up. Be gentle, but not too soft – press a little and work with your thumbs.

Step 9: Give Love to Her Hands

hands massage

Hand massage is very similar to a foot massage. Hands, like feet, are the map of the body. Start close to the wrist and go up.

Massage every area of her hand with your thumbs and finish off by gently playing with her fingertips. She’ll enjoy this.

Step 10: Finish With a Breast Massage

Breast massage

A chest or breast massage is a prelude to sex. If you are massaging other parts of her body, the chest should be the last. If you start with it you will make her very anxious and ready for love games and then what? Relaxing foot massage? It’s like eating dessert first and after it chewing a steak.

The trick with chest-breast erotic massage is to slowly build up the desire and finish off with the nipples. It is very important to read her body language – look at her face and listen to her. Don’t worry, she will tell you how hard you can be.

Start softly and gently and slowly build more pressure.

Remember to caress every area of the breast as they have essential erogenous zones all over them. Be more aggressive if she sounds encouraging, rub the breasts, bring them together, squeeze gently and finish off with the nipples.
Professional Masseuse | Menprovement

I don’t have to tell you what comes next. 😉

Step 11: Progress to a Pussy Massage

yoni massage

Now that she is fully relaxed in a state of bliss, it’s time to turn her pleasure up a notch.

When giving a sensual massage to your wife, it’s not an obligation to turn it into an erotic or tantric massage. This is your choice.

You can just leave it at a nice body rub.

Or you can progress to giving her a powerful orgasm.

Just make sure you always ask her. Just say, “Hey babe, do you mind if I massage your beautiful pussy?” If she says yes or just moans in ecstasy, then you’re good to go. 👍🏻

How to give a pussy or yoni massage:

So let’s move on to the good stuff. I am going to talk about the art of giving a top-notch Yoni massage (aka the pussy massage). Remember, this is all about showing your partner you’re here for her pleasure. 😏

I’m not going to go too deep here, but if you want to learn how to truly master the art of Yoni Massage, then check out our advanced training here.

Warming Up

Get those hands warmed up with some high-grade erotic massage oil, then begin to apply moderate pressure in a circular motion around her pussy.

The Art of Circles

Add pressure down the outside of her pussy where the legs of her clitoris run down. While you’re at it, make sure to remind her of how beautiful she is.

Discovering the Neighborhood

Spend a few minutes massaging the small muscles in her pelvic floor, around her pussy, and in between her pussy and anus.

Intimate Exploration

Slowly run one finger up and down the entrance of her vagina. Then, with your palm facing up, insert your two center fingers slowly into her vagina.

Pro Tip:

Fingernails should be well-trimmed!

The Beckoning

With steady pressure, move your fingers in a “come hither” motion inside her, while simultaneously massaging her clit with the thumb of your other hand in little circles.

If you can lick and suck her nipples while doing this, it’s a huge bonus.
Professional Masseuse
Listening to Her Melody

Be attentive to her body’s reactions. Keep up with your movements at a steady pace until she reaches orgasm.

This is a good start, and sorry I don’t have a YouTube video for this one – but if you want to take your pleasure giving skills to the next level, check out The Sexual Alchemy Course For Men from our very own in house expert Yuval Mann.

How to Turn a Sensual Massage into a Sex Massage

a woman moaning while a man hugs her

If this is your wife or girlfriend, the massage should most definitely prelude to sex.

Just go for it!

Slowly start to suck or lick her nipples, or gently begin to finger her, perform oral sex or penetration.
Professional Masseuse

To learn how to finger her like an expert, check out our erotic massage training course, which comes with our fingering mastery class as a bonus.

But maybe she’s not your girlfriend and you haven’t broken the ice of intercourse with her yet.

What then?

Say it’s your 5th date, she finds your massage book on your bedside table and she sparks some curiosity. After dinner, things start to get romantic and you offer her the full treatment.

She accepts.

You retire to the bedroom as she disrobes and you set the mood, light some candles and warm the massage oil. 30 minutes into the massage you heat up, and you want to transition into sex. What do you do?

Learn More >>> 10+ Shocking Sexual Fantasies For Women.

1) start by removing her towel fully

If she lets you without hesitation this is a really good sign, but just continue massaging like it’s no big deal.

2) If she’s on her stomach

Slowly start to massage higher and higher up her thigh until you reach the point right before her lady parts. Hold there and continue to massage her inner thigh, slightly grazing her vagina. She should start to get a little restless.

If after a few minutes, she hasn’t resisted or told you to watch your hands, you are safe to proceed further and begin to slowly finger her. From here the rest is all you. Or, if you two are on the same page, simply begin to enter her with your penis from behind while you are straddling. 😏

Receiving both sexual pleasure and massage pleasure at the same time cannot be beaten.

3) If she’s on her back

Make your way up to her chest and start massaging the area around her breasts. Again, stay here for a minute or two, and if you see no resistance start to massage her breasts. After a few more minutes proceed to use your mouth and caress her nipples. Again, from here the rest is all you.

4) Talk to her!

If you’re still unsure, just ask her. It’s less smooth and sexy, but it’s better than a slap in the face!

It’s up to you to gauge if your relationship is at that stage or if she is down to go further. Listen to her body, gauge her breathing, and most importantly have fun. But just in case, no means no.

Advanced Sensual Massage Techniques

massage therapist massaging a gorgeous blonde woman

Now that you have all the ingredients for a great sensual massage it’s time to learn the various techniques to take your skills to the next level.

The part of the body you are going to play with and the length of the play depends on your relationship with the woman. If it is date number ten – give her a present of a full body massage. Nothing says romance like the gift of relaxation.

If it’s a one-night stand and you are feeling a bit shy in the beginning – massage her hand to relax and enjoy the beginning of skin-to-skin contact.

Let the foreplay begin!

Here are a few sensual massage techniques that will make you seem like a master of the craft. (you can practice them on your body, for example, on your thigh)

Erotic Massage Technique 1: Shiatsu

Shiatsu is the main massage technique used in Japan and it is pretty easy to learn. If you have ever gotten a nice back massage and felt someone rubbing out your knots with their thumbs then you have had the shiatsu style treatment.

Just lay your hands or fingers on a certain spot while applying some pressure and rotate slowly. Try to find some knots in her upper back and loosen them up, but not too hard to the point that she is in pain.

If you are really experienced, you can use your elbow on places that really could use the pressure. But for now, let’s leave that to the pros.

Erotic Massage Technique 2: Compression

Compression is another common technique used in massage. Basically, you just press down on one area, increasing blood flow and loosening the muscle.

This is a good move to do before partaking in a deeper massage such as shiatsu, just to warm things up and get the blood flowing. This is also great on the buttocks, where you can place one hand on top of the other and rotate slowly.

Erotic Massage Technique 3: Stroking

The stroking technique is essentially long gentle movements with your hands along a portion of her body.

Keep your fingers together, thumbs parallel and palms in full contact with the body part you are massaging. This is extremely pleasing on all areas of the body. It’ll make her toes curl with pleasure.

Erotic Massage Technique 4: Friction

Friction is an advanced technique but is perfect for using on her hands and feet.

The friction technique rarely requires the use of essential massage oils, which is why you build up so much friction between your hand and her body. It is a focused stroke, which is used in some really small areas with a certain amount of stability and pressure.

Honestly, it’s better to leave this move for more advanced massage therapists. But if you do it – be gentle.

Erotic Massage Technique 5: Kneading

The kneading massage is great for getting deep into muscles and is perfect for her buttocks or any other fleshy areas. If you are doing it very gently you can do it anywhere. But don’t do it on her belly, especially if hers is not that flat. She can feel uncomfortable and fat.

Kneading is similar to the way a baker kneads bread. Have you ever made bread before? It’s really very simple. The way you do the kneading massage is by grasping and lifting the tissue (not too high!). First the palms press down on muscle tissue, then you push your fingers together and then then you move upward in a lifting motion.

All of these erotic massage moves go great together. For example: Apply Shiatsu to her shoulders, then use a little bit of massage oil and stroke the back, knead the buttocks, stroke the thighs and calves, and finish off with gentle friction on the soles of her feet. When you’re done, she will be purring like a cat.

Let’s Start the erotic massage

So now you have the perfect setup for giving your sensual massage. You’ve set the perfect mood, you have the best massage oil, and your techniques are spot on. You are ready to give the perfect sensual massage and have her graciously return the favor.

Here’s a look at a few popular sensual massage moves you can do tonight to get her in the mood.

9 Quick Tips for Unforgettable Sensual Massages

a man giving his wife an erotic massage

Make sure everything is warm and inviting, from your hands to the room, to the surface where she will lay. A pillow for her head is a must. No one wants a stiff neck when they’re meant to be relaxing!

#1 Setting the Stage for a Sensual Massage

Make sure everything is warm and inviting, from your hands to the room, to the surface where she will lay. A pillow for her head is a must. No one wants a stiff neck when they’re meant to be relaxing!

#2 Tools of the Trade

Always have a towel ready. Use it to cover her during the massage or as support for her ankles or neck. Comfort is the name of the game here.

#3 Aligning Her Body

Ensure her body is straight when she lies down. You’d be surprised how much tension can be released just by correcting her posture.

#4 Allergy Alert!

Before you go all-in, dab a drop of the massage oil on her hand to test for allergies. Trust me, you don’t want to deal with an allergic reaction in the middle of a sensual massage.

#5 Applying the essential Massage Oils

When it’s time for the erotic massage, apply the oil to your hands and not directly on her skin. It’s not a cooking show after all.

Best massage oil
Pure body almond massage oil
Pure Body
  • 100% pure, cold-pressed Sweet Almond Oil
  • Extremely relaxing
  • Makes your skin feel softer

#6 The Gentle Approach

Don’t be too rough. No aggressive pinching or pushing. The goal is to soothe and relax, not give her a wrestling match.

#7 Focusing on the Right Spots

You’re a massage therapist, not a chiropractor. Massage the muscles and be extra careful with the bones, especially around the spine.

#8 The Art of Communication

Talk to her, and ask what she likes. Her body’s reactions are the best feedback you can get. Remember, your sensual massage is a duet, not a solo performance.

#9 Embrace the Boldness

Finally, don’t be shy! Women love sensual massages and attention. Pour your focus and feelings into every movement. It’s not about fancy techniques, but about making her feel special.


Maria Isabella

P.S. Maybe it seems that this article is only about her pleasure, but believe me – it’s not. Because you are the one to collect her payback after the sensual rubdown is finished.

Editor’s opinion

Menprovement Rating

I love this article by Maria. She is spot on. I am a huge fan of sensual massages and have used their power for years, both in relationships and to take things to the next level. I think in this world of personal development, being a good massage therapist is some serious artillery to up your game.

Where ever you go, you will always either have the ability to either help people in pain or have an excuse to get a beautiful young girl you just met to come over and disrobe. Plus, any woman that you enter relations with is going to be hard-pressed to walk away from the man with the “magic hands.”

The path to becoming an “expert” massage therapist can go many ways and doesn’t have to be difficult. I encourage you to learn about other types of massage, like milking massage & if you want to learn more about expanding your sexual ability to complement your sensual massage – check out our guide to reaching sexual mastery.

Then get certified. You can do it in as little as 8 months. But whatever you choose, enjoy it. It really is a great skill to have.


  1. Stuart, A. (2008, August 13). Massage therapy styles and health benefits. WebMD. ↩︎

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