If you surf the internet for even just a few minutes, you can find articles galore online about overcoming PE (premature ejaculation) and lasting longer during sex… and most of it is total bs. For many years I struggled with bad premature ejaculation. I know firsthand that it can be VERY difficult to take control of this issue, and it can lead to self-esteem and relationship issues if you don’t fix the problem.
I tried all the common advice you hear on these articles, including:
~Thinking about something else, or distracting myself… All this did was disconnect my mind from what was going on in my body, so by the time I was overly physically aroused (this doesn’t stop!) and ready to finish, I had no control over the situation.
~The start-and-stop technique is another popular piece of advice to last long during sex. Sure, you’ll increase the overall amount that sex goes on for, but you’ll be STOPPING all the damn time. Women need non-stop penetration in order to reach climax. If you are constantly stopping before you reach orgasm, then you are constantly stopping before SHE reaches orgasm, too!
~Concentrating on her pleasure… While this is a good state of mind for sex in general, keeping her pleasure in mind will not prevent arousal from growing and reaching the finish line.
~Squeeze technique… pulling out your penis to squeeze it right when you are going to orgasm? Once again, see the start-stop issue… you are pulling out right when SHE is going to orgasm as well. The same thing goes for the advice about changing positions. Also, squeezing my head, or below my head, has never provided me with that “stopping” the arousal effect that this technique is supposed to provide.
~Having her pull on your testicles… this is supposed to PREVENT me from ejaculating? I remember a girl did this to me one time during doggy style… I completely lost control!
Common Advice That Works for Beating PE
A Roman study published in Therapeutic Advances in Urology showed that the majority of men (who previously suffered premature ejaculation) who performed Kegels for 12 weeks gained much greater ejaculation control, going from ejaculating in under 60 seconds to lasting 146 seconds, give or take 38 seconds. That’s a significant gain! Results continued at 6 weeks after the exercise period, showing only a slight reduction in results first seen after the 12 weeks.
Now, to really reap the benefits of Kegels, you need to target the PC muscle, while trying to relax neighboring muscles. Place a hand on your abs and buttocks, and try and keep them relaxed while concentrating solely on the PC muscle. After a good PC workout, you should see the base of your penis looking thicker (this effect only lasts a few minutes, but is a good sign).
It is common knowledge that wearing a condom will delay ejaculation in men. Besides the desensitization effect, wearing a condom also prevents you from having to “pull out” while ejaculating, allowing you those few extra pumps that may make the difference between your girl finishing or not.
The delaying effect is especially compounded if you wear one of those “extended pleasure” condoms… just make sure your penetration method is correct, placing a lot of pressure on her clitoris with your lower pelvis (rubbing into it).
A class of antidepressants, even a small dose of an SSRI has been shown to delay ejaculation and last longer during sex. It is believed that low serotonin levels are linked to premature ejaculation and that SSRIs can correct this issue, hence leading to improved “control”.
While SSRIs have a very powerful effect, these should be used as a last resort, as they may cause negative side effects such as reduced libido, fatigue, water retention, and weight gain. If your premature ejaculation is very bad, and taking a toll on your relationship though, consider requesting a small dose from your doctor.
Powerful, Uncommon Advice for Lasting Longer
Here are some powerful methods of overcoming premature ejaculation that is not as well-known.
1. Winter Savory
An ancient aphrodisiac, winter savory has been touted for centuries as an excellent herb for improving sexual performance and male potency. Winter savory not only allows men to last long during sex but boosts libido as well (by naturally increasing testosterone levels).
My own experience, as well as substantial anecdotal evidence, and studies on animals, have shown the same effects of winter savory. If you suffer from premature ejaculation, give this herbal remedy a shot.
2. Ejaculation Control Exercises
I’ve learned a number of ejaculation control training exercises that actually work to “retrain your brain”, into knowing deep down that you can last longer during sex (see here). At first, you perform the exercises on your own (somewhat like edging, but more concentration on the mental aspect), and once you can last as long as you’d like on your own, you apply this “mindstate” during sex.
3. Male Multiple Orgasm
The male multiple orgasm technique is an ancient Taoist technique that consists of intense strengthening of the PC muscle, and a well-timed, PC clamp (kegel) during orgasm. This blocks ejaculation during orgasm (two separate events occurring simultaneously), allowing you to “void” the refractory period — no downtime after orgasm.
You keep all of your mental and physical arousals and can continue on with a hard erection as if you haven’t even orgasm. You repeat the technique each time you reach orgasm, allowing you to last as long as you’d like… with orgasm no longer being the finish line.
REAL Advice to Use
I know premature ejaculation can seem hopeless. And the “airy” or “wishy-washy” advice you find in most places doesn’t help. You always have the foolproof method of SSRIs to fall back on, should your PE be very severe, and causing relationship issues. But give these other methods a chance, and you will most likely find a winner without needing a prescription!
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