This is The Menprovement Podcast Episode 094. In this episode I talk with Nathan Hafichuck. Nathan is a Transformational Coach guiding people through feeling all of their emotions so they can reclaim their freedom. Relying on his life experiences of growing up in a religious cult, being a single father and working in the oilfield he helps others lead with an open heart, allowing for deeper connections and greater intimacy.
– Feel The Full Impact of a Strong Negative Emotion – your ego wants to resist and deny and run away, but what you have to do when you feel a negative emotion is to go through it and process it. Your tendency to avoid suffering, leads to more suffering. It is counterintuitive, but there is no other way.
– Allow yourself to be vulnerable – let your guard down, it doesn’t make you weak, and won’t put you in a harm’s way. By resisting negative emotion, you will only build up an impenetrable armor that will eventually become your prison. Early on in your childhood you did open yourself up and became vulnerable, that’s why you closed yourself down, because the hurt was so painful. Today those defenses are no longer useful, and they just drain your mental energy.
– Acceptance is the key – you must accept all the negative emotions that you carry with you, and stop resisting them. Become comfortable with not being comfortable. Your natural reaction is to resist the negative emotion, become comfortable with it and let it go
– Negative emotions are bad – there’s no good or bad emotions, its just a judgment you place on it. Notice that the hurt itself is not bad, its just an ego saying that.