It goes without saying that divorce isn’t easy. Between the emotional, financial, and mental stress that happens initially when ending a marriage, you can feel drained afterward for weeks or even months.
But what happens when you feel like you’ve finally recouped from your divorce and are ready to start your life again? How do you get back into dating after being in a relationship for a while?
The answers to the questions aren’t one-size-fits-all. Despite that, there are some steps that you can take to help you feel comfortable and confident dating after a divorce.
Keep reading for some tips on how to date post divorce in 2022. And if after you want to continue to go down the dating rabbit hole, we’ve got a full 24 video lesson course teaching men everything they need to know about dating and talking to women they find attractive in a confident & authentic manner. Learn more below.
Step 1: Make Sure You’re Ready to Date Again
Dating after a divorce is not something you want to jump into too fast.
It’s important to wait until you’re fully over your previous marriage. While some men can rebound quickly and efficiently, many can’t. For some, a rebound will only give quick gratification. However, when alone, they’ll still have to face their emotions as these feelings won’t magically go away because they’re dating or having sex with someone new.
So, figure out which guy you are. Because who would want to be with someone that’s constantly talking about how bad their ex-spouse is or how great they were?
The answer is absolutely no one. So, do yourself and your potential date/lover a favor by assessing if you’re truly ready. It’ll be better for everyone involved.
When you know in your heart you are ready to date again after your divorce, then get started.
Having said all this, some guys will never feel ready to date again and can be hung up on their ex. This isn’t good either. If you feel this is you then you have to find a way to put yourself out there even if you don’t feel ready. For assistance read this article on 7 ways to get over your ex.
Step 2: Increase Your Confidence
Since you were married, the chances are you’ve been out of the game for a long time. Not always the case, but there may have been a certain amount of “letting yourself go.”
This often happens in relationships (guilty), and can even be a factor in the relationship ending.
Somewhere around the line you lose connection with yourself as a man. Whether it be in the bedroom, your purpose, how you look or how much you make your wife feel like a queen.
The spark goes..
The perfect example is the movie “Crazy Stupid Love,” where Steve Carrells character goes through a divorce and Ryan Gosling tries to help him connected to his manhood again. If you haven’t seen this movie watch it! It’s inspiring & very funny.
When beginning to date after a divorce, you may need to restore your confidence, rebuild or even redefine yourself as a man. Like in the movie, this type of transformation will often result in your ex wife falling in love with you all over again (if that’s what you want).
Here are some ideas:
a) Start with easy things like getting a simple haircut or buying clothes that will make you feel like a new man. Consider hiring a personal styling consultant to take it to the highest level.
b) One of the fastest ways to boost your confidence after a divorce is to up your game in the bedroom. Most guys do not know how to make a woman orgasm. Imagine knowing sexual secrets that 99% of men don’t and being able to bring any woman to a full body, powerful & even squirting orgasm. That’s confidence. Learn how to do this in our latest Menprovement X program here.
c) If you don’t like your body composition, start hitting the gym and adjusting your diet accordingly. I recommend Paleo or Keto, but make sure you only consume pasture raised meats.
d) If you experience hair loss, consult your doctor about a hair loss solution like Minoxidil or just shave it all off and own it (How to accept losing your hair). Got acne? Pay a visit to the dermatologist so they can provide recommendations. Whatever you think you can improve, take control of it so you can be as confident as possible out there.
Adversity often sparks huge transformation. Use this divorce to become the best version of yourself. This is your movie & you can do anything.
3) Determine What You Want
If you’ve determined that you are truly ready to start dating after your divorce, you should figure out how you’d like to go about it. Do you want to meet people organically? Or do you want to try out dating apps? Do you want something casual or do you want something serious? These are some of the questions that you need to ask yourself as it’ll make dating a lot easier on you.
a) Dating After a Divorce – Organically
If you know that you want to meet people organically, then you should prioritize going to populated places. Whether that be the bar, the dog park, or even the gym (within reason, don’t be creepy), frequent those places and make yourself open for conversation.
Read about how to ask a girl out at the gym without looking creepy here. If you do decide to go the organic route, which is my choice personally – learn how to talk to women in an authentic and natural way with our Menprovement X program with expert coach John Cooper here.
b) Dating After a Divorce – Online
If you’ve decided to go the dating app route, then there are some things you need.
1: First, you need clear photos with just you in them! While it’s nice to see that you have friends, no one wants to play “Where’s Waldo?”
2: If you’re going to go the online dating route you’ve got to make sure you stand out. You’ve got your nice clothes from step 2, now get some professional photos taken. This small investment will accelerate your efforts 10 fold.
Here are some good examples:
3: Next thing, be interesting. There are thousands of people on these dating apps, and while looks are always nice to have, personality shouldn’t be neglected.
4: Lastly, be honest. If you’re looking for casual, say that. If you’re looking for something serious, let people know. You’re trying to attract someone who genuinely likes you, so there’s no point in creating a fake persona. It’ll only come back to bite you in the end.
Find some more Dos and Don’ts when creating an online dating profile here.
5) Have Fun With Things
In the end, dating is what you make it. It doesn’t have to be this serious, all-consuming process if you don’t want it to. You control the pace of things so it’s up to you how you’d like things to go. If you don’t want to hop into another serious relationship, don’t. If you feel like you’re ready to take the plunge towards something more lasting, then go for it. Just have fun with whatever you do and be cognizant of your emotions as well as the emotions of others that you’re involved with.
You’re an autonomous powerful man who has a lot to offer anyone. Just express yourself, don’t try to impress and enjoy the journey. You’ll find what you need to find.
Have any post divorce dating advice for other guys out there? Let us know in the comments below!
Hey guys, I’m Sean a self improvement enthusiast with over 10 years experience in the health and wellness industry. My mission is to help you become the best version of yourself.
Certifications: Certified Life Coach, Dating Coach, Nutritionist