Whatever your past sexual encounters, whether they were few or many, good or bad, satisfying or frustrating – none of it matters.
No two sexual experiences are the same, so you still have plenty of opportunities to enjoy your sex life and make your partner the happiest girl in the world. After all, having satisfying sex requires the same psychological approach to success as anything else in life.
So regardless of your past, I am here to help you boost your sexual confidence and have that satisfying sex life you so often fantasize about.
Understandably, individuals have a lot on their minds – which can inhibit this sexual confidence from blossoming. Stress and just the pressures of getting by can be enough to make most people want to pull their hair out. And the more they think about these things, the more messed up their lives (and sex lives) become. And though men usually seem sexually dominating, you may be surprised how many men are shy around the people they are most attracted to! Don’t let it be you!
Great sex is something both men and women desire. While it comes naturally to some, for others it remains a tormenting and elusive dream. It all boils down to insecurity. When insecurity rises, confidence falls. And sex is all about confidence.
Here are 5 quick ways to boost your sexual confidence, and finally start enjoying sex as you should.
1) Don’t put pressure on yourself, nobody is judging
Men who enjoy watching porn are often stressed by things that are of no consequence. Many of you irrationally compare yourselves with guys acting in pornography which later makes you nervous, shy, and coming too early. You sometimes seem to not realize that both men and women porn stars are presented in just such a way as to lure and retain viewers and site visitors.
How does real sex compare with staged, faked sex? Not as much as you think. You cannot base your sexual confidence on a comparison to paid pornographic actors. It is one of the many reasons menprovement.com promotes staying away from porn to reach an optimal level of your existence.
What can you do if you are one of these guys?
Be honest with your partner and just perform as well as you can, without judging yourself too much. If there’s something you want to improve or try out sexually, you should discuss these fantasies and fears early on with her. Trust me, your girlfriend will be much more understanding than you think! And vulnerability is one of the sexiest traits in a man.
2) Inexperience isn’t a crime
Insecurity affects everyone, especially those who are unsure of who they are and what they are capable of. If you believe that others can satisfy your partner more completely, you’ll never make your partner happy.
Sex isn’t a competition, though it may feel that way sometimes, and no one is grading your performance. Relax, we expect a loving, honest, and gentle partner in bed, not a pornstar!
3) Think outside the bedroom
You must remember that when a girl lets you come inside her home or room or wherever else, she expects that the first move will come from your side. Make a plan so you know what you’re going to do before you get inside.
Remember: girls want attention, which means that we really want quality time with you. and she expects that you’ve made an effort to understand what we want before we even ask. Sounds paradoxical but it’s all about doing your homework.
So what do we want? Read more about that here. And here is a great article by J.D on how to make that first move and get her in the mood.
4) Focus on your partner
Inside the bedroom, there is nothing more important than your partner and her satisfaction. The most common mistake men make is focusing too much on her body instead of preparing their minds. Half of the sex is mental, so don’t forget about foreplay and heating things up before you get things going.
Kiss her, touch her, whisper in her ear, tell her how amazing she is, make her feel wanted. If you think you have inhibitions, trust me, women have a bunch more. They have fears, but if you make them feel valued and safe in your presence, any walls they’ve put up will crumble in the comfort of your embrace.
5) Don’t idealize beautiful girls
It’s only natural for men to fall head over heels for beautiful girls. Isn’t beauty supposed to be appreciated?
However, beautiful girls aren’t the only ones who deserve your flirtatious looks. Your partner may not have the looks of a goddess or budding beauty queen but if you make her feel like she’s the most beautiful woman in the world, she’ll make you feel the same way.
Touch her softly as you would a precious object, and be gentle. Your partner is your biggest ally and it’s important to show others how important and content she is with you. There’s no way to lose confidence around someone who makes you feel like life is worth occasional stumbles.
For the end, one very important reminder: even the most gorgeous girl is after all just a regular human being! I can assure you that no matter how confident she seems, she surely has some fears and complexes! There is no reason to be shy with any girl. If she wanted to have sex with you, it means that she fully desires you, and craves your confident, male moves.
So relax, and most of all enjoy!
I’m a 27-year old freelance writer that is passionate about psychology. After several relationships and many dates, I would like to share my honest female perspective about dating with you. After all, I’m just a hopeless romantic trying to figure it all out. Follow my journey at Get-A-Wingman.com